


For Better

by alyssamichellewriting



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: F/M, Kind of AU, Kylo Ren has feelings, Pre-Star Wars: The Force Awakens, Protective Kylo Ren, but like not to much before tfa, but not to AU, its really not going to matter a whole lot
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-18
Updated: 2018-07-16
Packaged: 2018-09-18 10:51:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,251
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9381272
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alyssamichellewriting/pseuds/alyssamichellewriting
Summary: How did just a regular, boring Starkiller base maid end up becoming Kylo Ren’s secret lover? Alyah isn’t quite sure of how that happened either, but she really isn’t complaining. Until one day, when everything went south and she had to leave the base and hide on the outer rim to hide from him. Can she stay hidden well enough so Kylo’s abilities can’t sense her?Pre-TFA & TLJ, will update here when I do decide to get there!





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> this is a little something that i've had in my head for ages and finally gotten around to finishing. yes its a bit AU and different, but i hope you enjoy it anyways. 
> 
> i do not own star wars. wish i did though. how cool would that be??

The annoying buzzer on her alarm startled her awake in the morning, just to be amplified by two once her roommate’s buzzed just as annoyingly. Through the thin walls she could hear the room next to her buzzing, and the room across as well. Alyah groaned as she rose out of bed and got her maids uniform on to start the day. Her roommate and friend followed suit as they walked out together to meet the other maids to see their cleaning assignments. 

“Morning Alyah, morning Pez. Ready for the day?” Their flamboyantly homosexual neighbor Marc asked them.

“Oh yeah, super ready to clean up after inconsiderate Storm Troopers!” Pez said to their friend as they looked at the screen with assignments. “Ugh, great. I have the training facilities restroom.” she groaned. Alyah looked for her name when Marc gasped in surprise. 

“Commander Ren’s private quarters. Are you kriffing serious?” Marc said. 

“Since when does Ren want us to go in his private quarters?” Alyah asked. Another maid from the side piped up hearing Alyah’s question. 

“When I was cleaning Hux’s quarters yesterday, he and Ren were arguing with Phasma about the state of his quarters. Aparently our great Lord Commander doesn’t do a good job at keeping everything orderly. Ugh, I wish I was you, Marc. Maybe you’ll see him without his mask.” the other girl, Loui, said to him. Marc did another groan as he walked away and Alyah proceeded to find herself on the list, finding herself under Captain Phasma’s quarters. 

“At least Phasma is easy to cooperate with.” she said to herself as she picked up her cleaning caddy and got ready to head upstairs. Pez got off at the training floor whilst Marc and Alyah walked together to the top floor where the important people were all housed. 

“I’d rather have to deal with Stormtroopers calling me a fag than have to walk into this quarters.” Marc said to her. Alyah held back a laugh.

“Just pray that he isn’t there and if he is don’t speak to him unless he speaks to you first and don’t look him in the mask.” Alyah said to her friend. Truth be told, she was scared for Marc. Commander Ren isn’t exactly the friendliest looking person and he scares the kriff out of her. When maids are not on duty they are to stay on the lowest of the floors in the base, but word travels fast of Ren’s anger issues and how he’s quick to force-choke Stormtroopers for just even thinking something wrong. Alyah is thankful she was not assigned to that, but also fearful for her friend. The two reached Ren’s quarters and Marc stopped outside the door. 

“Say a prayer for me.”

“You’ll be fine you wuss.” Alyah said, walking away. 

“Says the girl who isn’t afraid of anything!”

“Not true! He terries me!” she said, knocking on Phasma’s door. Within the seconds she finished knocking, Phasma sans helmet opened the door. 

“Hello Maid Alyah. Please come in.” she said to her. Out of uniform and off duty, Phasma was a great conversationalist and she tended to help Alyah do some of the cleaning. She was easy to cooperate with when off duty. “There is not much to be done today, only a little stain in the carpets from when Ren was in here yesterday.”

“Lost his temper?” Alyah asked her casually. Phasma simply nodded as Alyah went down onto the floor and started to scrub away at the stain with items from her caddy. Phasma went on to get ready for her day and Alyah kept scrubbing. 

She kept thinking to herself how Marc was doing one room over from her and kept praying that Commander Ren wasn’t in his quarters for Marc’s sake. She finished quickly, getting almost the entirety of the stain out, before Phasma dismissed her. She thanked her and left quickly, practically freezing in her steps once she left, seeing Commander Ren coming out of his quarters. They exchanged glances for a second, Alyah giving a faint nod before he broke their staring contest and sulked away quickly down the hall. Alyah realized then and there that he probably heard the conversation between Marc and her before they started working.

Alyah felt her breath finally release from her lungs as she stood in the hallway for a mere moment to give him time to get down the hall before she decided she was going to go the same way to get back to the maid’s quarters. When she got to the elevator he was no where in sight and breathed a sigh of relief as she got in, going to the maids quarters and putting her caddy back in her station. 

“Wow, you’re back early.” Loui said to her. Alyah shrugged. She didn’t have a particular like or dislike to the girl, she just annoyed her with her constant questions and her infatuation for Commander Ren. “Well, Hux said he didn’t even need me today. So I’ve just been down here. Marc is still so lucky. I wish I had his quarters to clean.” 

“I saw him when I was leaving Phasma’s quarters.” Alyah said casually, praying that the girl would leave her alone. Bringing Ren up probably wasn’t her best idea.

“You what? What happened? What was he like?” Loui asked her. 

“Listen, it was terrifying. He terrifies me, and I’m not afraid of much. I was leaving Phasma’s quarters and he was exiting his and he stared at me and I gave him a nod cause that’s just about all I could think of doing, and then he stopped staring and walked away. Not so glamorous. If you excuse me Loui, I need to go to my room.” Alyah said, excusing herself from the girl and almost running to her room. Pez and Marc were already there to her surprise.

“Alyah, it was terrible. He heard everything we said, and he made sure I knew it. Then he proceeded to control me with the force while I cleaned. It was terrible. I didn’t even get to see him without the mask.” Marc explained to them. 

“I mean, I saw him in the hall but he didn’t do or say anything to me.” Alyah said to the group. 

“Well honey I mean, look at you. Ass and boobs. All you need to attract any man, thats saying if he’s a man at all.” Marc said to her. 

“Can we move on from talking about our creepy Commander? It’s Friday night, where are we going?” Pez asked them. Alyah shrugged her shoulders as Marc immediately spoke up with an idea. 

“A club. A lounge. Anything where I can drink to forget this entire experience.” Marc said to the group. Alyah held back a laugh at her friend’s dramatic tone. Marc could be a little overly dramatic at most points, and clearly today was one of the points. 

“Well lucky for you I heard some Stormtroopers talking about this club called Rage on my way back down here. It’s new and apparently there is a variety of people that go, so it won’t be just Stormtroopers. We can check that out?” Pez said to them. 

“Sounds okay to me. We should book a hotel to stay in so we don’t stumble in here at 3 in the morning drunk.” Alyah said to the two of them. 

“Good idea. You guys handle all that, and I’m going to pick my outfits for the weekend.” Marc said. Alyah was about to shout at him to stay and help but he was already gone. 

“That boy is something else.” Pez said to her. Alyah nodded in agreement, going online on her data pad to see if there was anywhere they could stay. It was going to be a fun weekend. 

——

Hours had passed and Alyah was now checking in to the hotel. She had found something nice but pricey and the three had agreed to split the cost three ways. She got the room keys from the desk person and the three went up to see their three-day vacation suite style room. 

“Holy moly, this is nice!” Marc said excitedly as he ran into one of the rooms to throw his stuff down. “We’re living in the lap of luxury for a weekend ladies!” The two girls rolled their eyes at him as they each went into a separate room and got ready for their night. Alyah had opted to wear a faux-leather high-waisted pair of black shorts with a red crop-top and combat boots. She let her hair fall straight down and barely put make up on, since she knew she would just sweat it all off anyway while dancing and drinking. She knew that out of both her friends she was the one that was dressed most conservative and that they would both most likely complain to her about it, but she didn’t care. It wasn’t her style to dress provocatively and go out to get men, she just liked to go out to drink and have fun. 

“Let’s go ladies! By the time we get there all the good men will be taken!” Marc shouted to the girls. Alyah gave herself a once-over before leaving her room and finding her two friends waiting for her outside. “Really Aly? That’s what you’re wearing?”

“Shut the hell up and get out the door.” Alyah said to him, taking the lead and leaving them behind. Once they got in the elevator Pez spoke up the group. 

“We make our pact now. No one sleeps with a guy or comes back with one, are we clear?” she said. 

“You’re ruining the fun.” Marc said. Both girls gave a pointed glare to their friend as he sighed. “But fine. I make no promises about the other things I can do to a man.” 

“Sometimes Marc it’s better to not say anything at all.” Pez said back to him as they stepped out of the elevator and walked around the block to the club. It was packed on the outside, you couldn’t tell who was a Stormtrooper and who wasn’t. Everybody was out of uniform and piling into the club. Alyah was thankful she only brought her keycard for the hotel and a little bit of money because checking a bag would be a nightmare for her. 

“To the bar!” Marc said, dragging both girls through the crowd to the semi-full bar. “Three twisted shots as strong as you can get for me and the ladies.” he said to the bartender. He gave Marc a nod as he turned around and Alyah let out a laugh. 

“You make it sound like we’re your hookers.” Alyah said. 

“Have to make the other gays jealous first, my love. Now will you please, for the love of god, let lose? Make out with a stranger! Sleep with someone in the closet! Strip!” Marc said to her. 

“I’m here to drink and dance. That’s it.” 

“Sure honey. You’re going to be the first one of us in the night to break the pact.”

“No I’m not!” She bickered back to him. 

“Yes, you are. Tall, dark and handsome in the corner over there has been eyeing you since you walked in.” Marc said to her. She went to turn around before he stopped her. “Don’t just turn around! You have to be discrete!” 

“How the fuck am I going to be discrete if I can’t turn around to see if he’s hot?!” Alyah said to her friend as their shots got delivered. Without hesitation Alyah took hers and downed it before the other two did. “What’s he look like?” Expecting Marc to answer she braced herself for over exaggeration, but Pez beat him to it. 

“Looks pretty tall, maybe about six feet. Black curly hair, a little long but still looks good. Totally your type, he’s hot. If you don’t snag him I will.” Pez said. 

“You need to get his attention. We need to dance. You need to shake your ass.” Marc said to her. 

“I need a few more shots to do that.” 

“No need. He’s coming over here.” Pez said. 

“WHAT?!” Alyah said, downing another shot that appeared on the table. Sure enough she felt a presence in the seat next to her order a drink. 

“I see man candy over there. Pez, you’re my wing-woman.” Marc said, dragging Pez away from the bar and into the crowd of people. 

“More shots?” the bartender asked. 

“The strongest shit you’ve got.” she replied. She heard a chuckle from the seat next to her and decided to turn and look. Shit, Pez was right. He’s hot. 

“Seems like you’re in for a night.” He said to her. 

“My friend had a bad day and he gets to be a bit much when he’s stressed. So yeah, I need this.” She said to him. Alyah was not the best socialist. She turned very awkward when she came across people most days and with men and flirting, she was totally useless. Who ever this guy was, Alyah could safely admit that he was attractive. She remembered that Marc said to let lose and she wanted to with this guy. There goes the pact. 

“What do you do in the base?” he asked her. Smalltalk, she despised it. She played along for the sake of conversation. Plus she had no clue were Marc and Pez went so he was her only source of entertainment. 

“I’m a maid. My friends are too. Assignments are random but nine out of ten times I clean up for Captain Phasma. My friend cleaned for Commander Ren today, thus why we’re here drinking our lives away.” she said to him. Bringing in Marc’s experience with the Commander might not have been a good idea, but she was half-way to drunk at this point and didn’t really care. Plus, it’s not her problem. 

“It couldn’t have been that bad where you have to drink this much.” he said, finishing up the second of his own drink. Alyah slowed down a bit, seeing as she was on her fourth shot and she could feel the world turning slightly. 

“I don’t know, I just like to drink and dance. It’s an excuse to get off base.” she said to him. He laughed and she took another shot. Once she took that shot, things started to get blurry for her. “Excuse me for a minute.” Alyah tried to stand up, but almost fell over. The man she was with caught her before she hit the ground and stood her back up. 

“You shouldn’t walk alone.” he said to her. She rolled her eyes as he didn’t let her go. 

“Unless you want to come to the bathroom with me then let go. I can handle myself.” Alyah didn’t know how clear that sentence came out, but judging by his face it probably wasn’t clear enough. 

“At least let me get you there. You can barely stand on your own two feet.” He didn’t even give her the option, he just took her arm and lead her through the crowd to the back bathrooms. They didn’t make it into the bathroom, as Alyah accidentally opened up a closet by running into it, causing the two of them to both fall into it. Thankfully no one was inside and she took this as her chance to listen to Marc’s advice. 

“Do you know how attractive you are? Like seriously?” she asked him. There was no filter currently and she couldn’t exactly read his face, there was one light in the closet and it wasn’t that bright. She heard a click of the door and saw that he locked it. 

“Depends, do you know how attractive you are?” he said. Without giving her a chance to listen, he crashed his lips onto hers and started to intensely make out with her. Alyah wasn’t in a state to argue so she put her hands in his hair and continued to make out with him back. After that, it was all a blur.


	2. Chapter 2

Alyah woke up the next morning in her bed at the hotel. _How did I get here?_ The last thing she remembered clearly was taking shots at the bar, then tall, dark and handsome coming over to her. Then she tried to get up and….

 

_Oh no._

 

All the blurry images started to become slightly clearer as Alyah recalled the events of the previous night. She was aware that she had made out with tall, dark and handsome but did she do _other_ things with him? And when did it happen? Alyah was naked under her sheets and at the state of her bed she wasn’t able to tell if they had done it right then and there in the closet or if they traveled back here. Her eyes traveled to a note on her nightstand. She stretched out to read the note that she hoped would help shed light on the situation. 

 

_I brought you back to your hotel, you were too drunk to stay longer._

_Yes, we slept together. I want to see you again. Sober this time._

_Come back to base tonight._

 

_Commander Ren_

 

“WHAT THE FUCK?” she screamed, throwing the note and letting it slowly fall to the bed. She heard the other two doors open and quick footsteps as her door was thrown open as she started to hyperventilate. 

 

“WHAT?!” Marc asked. 

 

“Are you naked?” Pez asked. “Oh my _god_ you slept with him! You dirty slut!” Marc said. Alyah stopped hyperventilating and picked up the note to show her friends. 

 

“I… guys… I slept with Commander _Ren.”_ she stuttered out. Her two friends were speechless. If jaws could drop to the ground, that's where their jaws would be. “I mean… of all the people I could have slept with, it was the Commander. I chose HIM of all people to sleep with.”

 

“Technically he chose you.” Marc said. There was a silence among them before Pez spoke up. 

 

“Holy _shit,_ Aly. What the hell are you gonna do? He wants to see you again and you can’t exactly say no to the Commander.” Pez asked her. 

 

“Good fucking question Pez. I can’t say no to him so what the fuck else am I supposed to do?! Don’t even answer that. There is nothing else I can do except pack up my shit and get back to base cause I can’t say no to him!” Alyah said as she frustratingly collapsed back on her bed. 

 

“You could flee to the Outer Rim and change your name!” Marc commented as Alyah finally found her shirt next to her and started dressing slowly. 

 

“He’d still find her, he’s a force user.” Pez said, sitting down on the bed next to her and tossing her a pair of pants.

 

“Good point,” Marc said to them as Alyah slipped her clothes on quickly. She stormed out of bed and packed her bag. “This shit stinks. Couldn’t he wait to get it in again until tomorrow afternoon?!”

 

“Apparently not.” Alyah muttered as she stepped into her shoes and took a once over of her room. 

 

“Well… he technically said come back ‘tonight.’ It’s only 10 A.M, we still have some time to shop around.” Pez said to her. 

 

“Good point. But do I really want to face the wrath of Kylo Ren if we go overboard and I’m late? No. I’ll just go back now and find something to do until later tonight.” Alyah said, picking up her bag and walking out of the room. Her friends followed as she put her keycard down on the counter. 

 

“How are you gonna know when he wants to see you?” Marc asked. 

 

“I have no clue. Maybe he put his information in on my data pad or something while I was asleep. I’ll find out when I get there.” she said to them, opening the door. Pez put a hand on her shoulder. 

 

“You got this.”

 

“If I don’t message you guys with how it went, assume I’m dead.” Alyah said, shutting the door and walking out of the hotel with her bag. She walked by herself to the shuttle stop and bought herself a ticket to the next available one back to Starkiller, taking a seat on an open chair in the waiting lounge. The waiting room consisted of off-duty Stormtroopers who were all talking about who they hooked up with last night. Their conversations all stopped short and they turned to the right as Alyah looked over to the direction they were. 

 

_Are you fucking kidding me?_ Alyah had to fight to keep a straight face when she saw it was Kylo Ren they were all staring at. Full armor and mask, he walked through with two of his Knights and Captain Phasma to his Command shuttle. _Oh yeah, of course, notice me among all the Stormtroopers._ Kylo Ren had turned his head and kept his gaze on Alyah as he walked by her. 

 

**_Keep your thoughts to yourself._** His voice boomed in her head and it was at that moment that she remembered he was a force-user and could hear everything she was thinking if he wanted to.

 

_Shit._

 

**_That’s not keeping your thoughts to yourself._ **

 

_How the hell am I supposed to do that?! Just get out of my head!_

 

He paused before his Command shuttle and took one more quick glance at her before boarding, Alyah finally letting go of the breath that she had been holding. She knew that she was in for a long day after that conversation and she was left to her thoughts before boarding to go back to base. The thought that continuously ran in her head was ‘why me?’. Alyah was sure that Kylo Ren could pick anybody that he wanted up in the higher ranks that would be more valuable to the First Order and yet he chose a maid, the lowest of the low ranks he could possibly find. She wasn’t special, she came from Tatooine and applied for the First Order just to get the hell out off the desert planet. 

 

Alyah’s thoughts were interrupted as she heard her flight number get called out. She boarded her shuttle quickly and took a seat all the way in the front to avoid having to get stuck in between Stormtroopers. It wasn’t a long ride from where they were back to base, so when they landed she stormed off quickly and went all the way down the elevator to the maid’s quarters. The quarters were empty except for one person - the person that Alyah wanted to see the least. 

 

“Alyah! You’re back early! One of the Knights of Ren came looking for you saying that COMMANDER REN wanted to see you as soon as you got back. How did you get to lucky?!” Louie said to her happily. 

 

“I wouldn’t consider it a _lucky_ thing Louie. Did they say where to go?” she asked, opening her room and throwing her bag down. 

 

“What are you talking about not a lucky thing?! If I was you - ”

 

“Answer my question, Louie. Where do I meet him?!”

 

“Didn’t say. Just said that they’d come back when you arrived to take you there.” Louie said. Alyah groaned as she went into her room. “Where’re going?! They might come back!”

 

“To take a shower!”

 

“But Commander Ren - ”

 

“Probably doesn’t want me to smell like an entire handle of vodka when I meet him!” Alyah shut the door to her room and went into her shower. _So much for meeting me tonight, huh?! It’s not nighttime you know, it’s only noon!_ She made sure to scream it in her thoughts so he could hear her frustration. She received no response as she washed her hair and body, immediately feeling refreshed as she stepped out of the shower and threw clean clothes on, brushing her hair out quickly and placing it in a wet braid. She sat down on her bed and sighed as there was a knock on her door. “What, Louie!?”

 

“Come out, it’s for you.” she said. She groaned as she stepped out of her room to see Kylo Ren standing in the maids quarters. _Dear god, how is Louie still standing? It’s a miracle!_

 

“You. With me.” he said through his mask, going over to the door. 

 

“Yes, Commander.” she said back formally as she followed him out. They walked the base in silence and went up the elevator in silence as well. Alyah tried to keep a blank mind and didn’t say anything at all. She really didn’t want to piss him off in an elevator. They stopped at the top floor of quarters and he walked out with Alyah following behind him. The pair walked to the end of the hallway before he entered a code in and a door opened. 

 

“After you.” He said to her. She nodded as she walked past him through the door. She observed the room and concluded that they were in his private quarters, which were bigger than the whole of the maid’s quarters combined. Everything was extremely dark and bland, which was a relief to her eyes as the maids quarters was bright white that blinded her almost every morning. She heard the door shut and what sounded like a hiss and turned around to see him taking off his helmet. “You have questions.” Alyah nodded slowly as he looked at her to ask them. 

 

“Why me?” she asked. 

 

“Your thoughts intrigue me. You’re not loyal directly to the First Order, you’re not Resistance, you simply just don’t care. You’re only here because you didn’t want to be on Tatooine any longer - which I understand. Sand is quite annoying.” 

 

“My thoughts intrigue you? An hour ago you told me to basically shut up!” she said to him. Alyah jumped out of her skin because in two long strides he was practically towering over her, making Alyah feel small.

 

“Such beauty… such fire… such a waste of a job you have…” he said to her, placing both of his gloved hands on her face. Her heart skipped a beat as he looked down at her carefully. He was looking into her mind, examining her face to see who she was. She could feel him inside of her mind looking around, but it wasn’t painful. Wasn’t it supposed to be painful? “You’re not feeling pain?” she shook her head at his question. “Interesting.” he simply pulled away from her at that point. 

 

“What does that mean?” she asked him. 

 

“Usually when one tries to use the force to see into somebody’s mind, it pains them, even to other force users. Except for one instance, when two people are to be bonded by the Force together to become soulmates,” he said back to Alyah. Her mind was still in the middle of processing everything that he had said to her when he dropped the bomb, “We’re force-bonded soulmates.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> finally! sorry for the wait, i had MAJOR writers block but for some reason today at work i banged out nearly the entire chapter.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning: mild smut. very, very mild that it probably shouldn't even be considered smut.

Alyah was feeling a swarm of emotions. She was shocked, confused, intrigued slightly, and mostly scared. Definitely scared. _Force-bonded soulmates._ She had no idea what that entailed and what to do about the fact that the person she was bonded with terrified her to no end. She was thinking nothing, which intrigued Kylo. Here was someone who boomed so loudly in his mind without even trying, not thinking a thing after dropping a bomb like that. 

 

After seeing her in the hallway for the first time, she caught his attention. He could feel what most people around him were feeling and thinking because of the Force. But when Alyah walked out of Phasma’s quarters and into the hallway, everything that she felt he did on a larger more intense scale. She has been scared of him, but not as intensely as other people on the base. He could feel the tension inside her when she realized he was in the hallway with her and that she had tried her best not to set him off. Kylo had known something was different about her when he walked away and he could _feel_ what she was feeling and that it had impacted his mood. So he meditated on it later that evening and recalled something that he learned in his youth - that Force-bonded Soulmates were real and what he was feeling were typical feelings for that. 

 

Still, after coming upon that realization, he needed to see for himself. He followed them into the club and watched her as she sat uncomfortably with her two friends. Every shot she took he could feel inside him and he could feel her becoming more and more intoxicated. Sleeping with her that night was the confirmation for him that his suspicions were true. Kylo might as well have been drunk because he could feel it from her. 

 

He’s been at battle since then on if he should report such a thing to the Supreme Leader. Surely he must, but yet there was something keeping him from doing so. Force-bonds were something that he did not know much about and that both of his masters never really bothered to explain, but he knew that both masters believed they made you weaker. He wanted to use this bond to his benefit to learn more about them and see if he could use it to make him stronger. 

 

Meanwhile, Alyah finally felt her strength come back and got the courage to move away from him and take a seat on the sofa in his quarters. She felt him watching her with curiosity, wondering what she was going to do next. She didn’t know what she was going to do next or how to feel about what Kylo just told her. It was a major bomb to drop on her and it made her terrified to think more about it. When she needed to not think, there was only one thing that could help her. 

 

“Do you have any alcohol?” she asked him. Kylo looked taken aback by the question, not expecting that to be the first thing she’s said in ten minutes. He nodded and went into his kitchen cabinet. She watched him now as he went through the cabinet and picked out a specific bottle and two glasses, pouring one for her and one for himself. He strode back over to the couch, handing her the glass. Within seconds, Alyah drank half the glass. He cocked an eyebrow at her as she was silent again. 

 

“It’s the strongest I have.” 

 

“I can taste it.” Alyah said. They sat in silence as both of them drank. The Commander watched her with a careful eye and Alyah stared at the floor. After five minutes of mildly uncomfortable silence, Alyah was the first to speak. “What happens to me now?” she asked him. 

 

Kylo scoffed out loud and rolled his eyes at the question. “You’re not going to be killed or forced to marry me, if that’s what you're thinking.” He left out that if the Supreme Leader was told, one of the two would be a definite outcome. 

 

“Well that’s a relief.” she mumbled. 

 

“I sense your hesitance.” he said to her. She finally looked back up at him, her eyes wide. She didn’t know if she would respond back fully what she was thinking or attempt to filter herself. What she wanted to say and what she needed to say were on polar opposite ends of the scale for her. 

 

“Well… yeah. I think I have a little right to be.” she said to him. _You’re the most terrifying person in the universe what the fuck did you expect me to do be?!_ Kylo smirked and laughed - something that truly terrified Alyah. She didn’t think he knew how. 

 

“Are the maids truly that terrified?” he asked her. 

 

“Look at what you wear on a daily basis and answer that yourself. The whole base is terrified of you. Except for of course - ”

 

“That one annoying girl who’s actually having an affair with Hux.” Alyah almost spat out her drink, causing Kylo to laugh again. “The walls are thin. I also know everything that goes on.”

 

“I think you’ve actually just made my day with that. Holy shit.” Alyah said, holding back the laughter and the urge to get out her communication pad to immediately send that to Pez and Marc. She felt strangely relaxed, and that freaked her out in a sense. She was sitting in front of the most feared person in the galaxy, having a casual conversation and drinking wine after being told they were soulmates by a Force bond that he discovered after they drunkenly slept together. It didn’t seem right to her, at all. 

 

“You only feel as if it's not right because you don’t understand.” he said, pausing to put his glass down and going to sit next to her. “I, myself, don’t understand much about it. I know that I can feel your emotions and thoughts and you can feel mine and we can speak back to each other through it.”

 

“Well that definitely makes me feel better.” she said. If he didn’t understand it, they were doomed. 

 

“Stop it with the act. I can feel your emotions, hear your thoughts - you can’t fool me.” he said to her. Alyah felt like she could have shrunk in her seat at that very moment - he was right, she couldn’t fool him and she knew that. He could feel everything about her and knew everything about her. And that thought terrified her to no end. “There’s no need to be afraid. I wouldn’t hurt you.” 

 

“Then what do we do now?” she asked him. 

 

“We strengthen it and learn from it.” Kylo was convinced the bond could make him stronger - but first she had to get stronger. She needed to be almost as strong as him or else it wouldn’t work and the Supreme Leader would notice. He wanted to make it work. 

 

“But I’m just a maid. I clean up after others. I’m not a fighter or a warrior or whatever you think I could be. I’m pathetic.” Alyah said to him. 

 

“Trust me and you can be so much more than that. You can be powerful. We can be powerful together. You just need to trust me.” he said to her, almost putting his lips on her ear. It aroused her, and he could feel it. Sure, the goal for him was marriage and heirs that had the Force, but it also meant way more than that for him. Sometimes, he craved companionship and he wasn’t sure if it was the bond that made him crave that or not. Kylo made the first move and pressed his lips on hers and captured her in his arms. 

 

Alyah gasped slightly at the sensation and the surprise of him making the first move so passionately. She wasn’t used to anybody wanting to give her attention or be around her (besides her friends, of course) so the feeling of being with somebody was new and exciting to her. She climbed onto his lap as he strengthened his hold around her and she placed her hand on his cheek, bringing him as close as possible. 

 

**_If you keep doing that we’re going to end up in bed._ **

 

_Your point?_

 

With that thought leaving her mind, he picked her up and brought her into his bedroom, throwing her onto his massive kingsize bed and collapsing on top of her. His hands immediately begun working at the hem of her shirt, pulling it up and over her head. She made a sorry attempt to start undoing his clothes, but all of the armor got in the way. He smirked as he got up and undressed himself for her - Alyah having a heart attack at the sight of his abs. He dove back down onto her and continued to work at removing her clothes, going down to her pants, then her bra, then her underwear. 

 

Without a second thought he was filling her with more pleasure than she had ever felt in her life. She reminded herself to never get black-out drunk to sleep with him again - she always wanted to feel like this when she was with him. He took command of the situation, kissing her like she had never been kissed before and clinging onto him like he was her life line. She was not the only part of that whole that was feeling like that - Kylo could sit there and do that all day with only her. He worried that she was changing him and bringing him to the light, but in that moment he did not mind, and when she got stronger they would both go towards the dark together. That is what mattered to him. 

 

Alyah was moaning through kisses and Kylo was trying to make himself last as long as possible. He wanted to make the moment last as long as possible - but with her climax crashing through his own did as well. They lay on the bed together, Alyah panting to catch her breath and Kylo reflecting on his behavior. 

 

The Commander of the First Order shouldn’t be messing with the likes of Maids. She was beneath him socially and economically. He had other things he needed to be doing. He needed to be finding the map to Skywalker and training more. But here he was, laying next to who he thought was one of the most beautiful people he’s ever seen. What was it that attracted him to much to her? He needed to work with her more to find out. One thing was for sure though, and that was that he would kill anyone who tried to take her from him. 

 

Maybe she wasn’t pulling him towards the light after all. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEY YALL ITS BEEN A WHILE. 
> 
> basically school and summer kicked my muse's ass, but i'm back hopefully able to update more regularly. once i get past the awkward first 5 chapters things pick up. next chapter is gonna suck cause it will probably be a filler and chapter 5 is when shit starts to happen.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> woohoo short chapter! things are getting kicked into gear now and will intensify very quickly - i hope.

After the escapades that she had with the Kylo, Alyah didn’t hear from him again for a week. Once more, an effort to learn more about their bond ended up in bed. She was discovering a lot about him through the ‘training’ sessions that they shared. She didn’t exactly know much about him but she did know that there was more than meets the eye in terms of Kylo Ren.

For one, she gathered that he was a low-key hopeless romantic. After not talking to her for a week he managed to spend an entire day with her, the two of them having endless sex and sleeping most of the day. That pissed Hux off of course, Phasma filling her in the next day when she went to clean on his frustration. The bliss did not last very long as shit hit the fan quickly.

Kylo started to get wrapped up in finding the map to Luke Skywalker, that Alyah discovered by accidentally hearing some of his thoughts. At first she feared for her life once he found out, but he surprised her and didn’t get angry. Instead he filled her in on why it was important to him and that he was going to be away for a long time while he tried to find it. It gave her comfort while he travelled the galaxy that she was still able to feel him to make sure he was safe. She knew that he was capable of holding his own, but she was a natural worrier with people she cared about. Which it was bizarre to her still that she actually cared about him, but it was hard to not admit anymore.

After Kylo’s departure, Alyah started getting violently sick. At first it seemed to just be a stomach bug so she just took the time off of work. But it didn't go away. So she went to the med bay and they told her it was just a stomach bug. But Pez and Marc didn't believe it worth a damn.

"Aly, they didn't do a blood test or anything. They just looked at you and said 'oh, she looks like shit - probably the flu.' It's not the flu." Pez said, sitting on the edge of Alyah's bed as she messaged Kylo on her communication pad telling him about her illness. Sometimes he responded and sometimes he didn't, but she could sense he enjoyed it anyway.

"What else could be wrong?" Alyah asked her friend.

There was a silence in the room before Marc shouted from in her bathroom a groan. "OH MY GOD if you're not going to say it, I am. YOU ARE PREGNANT." he shouted, going to the doorway. Alyah sat up straight in bed, closing the mental door link between her and Kylo that she had learned how to do and set up when he was last around. She felt her heart sink to her stomach and could visibly feel herself losing color in her face.

"I'm sorry.... what?" she asked him.

"Honey, your calendar that you keep in your bathroom to tell when you're about to bleed - yeah it hasn't been looked at obviously because you are three weeks late." Marc explained to her.

"We did you the favor of stealing you a pee stick from the med bay." Pez said to her.

"I know a guy. Now go pee on it and make sure that your boy-toy isn't listening in on the conversation!" Marc said to her, taking a pregnancy test out of his pocket and handing it out to her. Alyah shakily took it in her hands and stood up, going into her bathroom. Before taking the test, she stared down at it.

She hadn't thought about being pregnant. When you're sleeping with Kylo Ren you don't think about Kylo Ren. You think about the fact that you're sleeping with Kylo Ren - that you are enjoyed by him enough to actually be in bed with him. Alyah hadn't been concerned about getting pregnant and he hadn't shown concern in it either. Pregnancy was something that just didn't happen for women in the First Order. They knew better and were to busy with working to care about such things.

Alyah took her time taking the test and peeing on the stick, the little piece of plastic starting to blink, signaling it was calculating if she was pregnant or not.

What would she do if she were? She was pretty sure that he wouldn't want a child - no, she knew that he didn't want a child. Supreme Leader Snoke would either have her killed or take the child for his own - and she didn't want any of that. But Alyah did know that if she was carrying a child, she needed to get as far away from the First Order as possible to raise it. She was imagining the worst for her child, as she had a right.

"What does it say?!" Marc said from outside the door. Alyah snapped out of her thoughts and picked up the plastic once more that was holding the fate of her future on it. She breathed heavily as she turned it over, gasping and almost dropping it.

"It's positive." she said to him. She heard the door open and both her friends come running in. She stared at the words 'PREGNANT' in disbelief, not wanting to believe it herself that she was pregnant with the child of Kylo Ren. In her frozen state she felt Pez put her arms around her shoulders in comfort. For a long time no one said anything to her, letting her soak in the news and what was going to happen. She breathed in heavily and exhaled, taking deep breaths for many moments. It was Pez who broke the silence.

"There's no policy for this on board. Whatever you want to do, we're here for you." she said to Alyah. Alyah finally looked away from the test and turned around, looking to her friends.

"I need to get off this ship, and far, far away from the First Order." Alyah declared.

"My sister lives in Theed on Naboo. We can start there and stay with her." Marc said to them. Alyah nodded to him. "Look, incase this was positive I stole you these vitamins as well. You stay relaxed, keep claiming sick, keep him out of your head until I come back to you with a plan. There's a shuttle going off base and from there we'll be able to find a pilot to take us to Naboo. This stays between us."

"We're going to desert? And what happens if he comes back?" Pez asked.

"Put on your best acting faces and keep your thoughts to yourselves. What matters is that Alyah knows as little as possible about when we're leaving just incase he does find out somehow." Marc said. Alyah had to sit on the edge of her bath to process what was going on. She would be able to keep him out of her thoughts easily but the main issue she was going to have was keeping herself calm for her sake and her baby's sake. "Are we all still in to stay with this idea?" Marc asked.

"I'm in - for Alyah's sake." Pez declared.

"Just get me the hell off of this base and as far away from the First Order and him as possible." Alyah declared. She wasn't testing the waters when it came to this childs life - and she would finally be free from the First Order.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> apologies that it has been so long! school and life had my ass on the ground but hopefully i am back and so is this! i've decided to take the story in a semi-different direction once she left the first order and i'm kind of digging it.

It had been two weeks since Alyah found out she was pregnant with Kylo’s baby and she hadn’t felt any better about it now than she did before. She was still getting her usual morning sickness. Neither Pez nor Marc talked to her about the leaving plan - which annoyed the utter shit out of Alyah. She knew that it was for her and the baby’s safety that she know as little as possible about the plan incase Kylo came back and tried to pry. Which according to Kylo himself, was not going to be any time soon. 

 

Still, even with her word that he was not returning soon, she was not allowed to know anything and it drove her nuts. It made her reflect a lot on her own personality and her past. One might think that taking off and going away isn’t a good way to solve problems - but to Alyah it is the only way to deal with stress. Growing up, her father would take her away from dangerous situations he was uncomfortable with. She’d never learn to cope with those situations and still hasn’t. She has no fight or flight - just flight. It was no wonder that even as an adult her first instinct was to leave, she was uncomfortable in the situation. 

 

She wasn’t uncomfortable having the baby of the Commander, she was uncomfortable with him being around a baby. As gentle and uncharacteristically calm that he was around her, he was still very much unpredictable in situations out of his control. She didn’t want to think of what would happen when he found out. Children were absolutely out of the question for him period as it would distract him from the Order. Hell, even their relationship was out of the question in all technicalities to the Supreme Leader. Snoke would have her ordered to be killed right on the spot if he found out about that. 

 

Alyah had a feeling that Phasma was catching on to something being up. Whenever she goes to clean she has to wear a mask to keep as much of the chemicals out of her as she can and wears more durable gloves than normal. First Phasma didn’t seem to notice but lately she’s been giving Alyah a look of suspicion. As soon as she told it to Pez and Marc they offered to do double-time and switch off doing the shift for her, making excuses to their superior about why she couldn’t do it herself. 

 

What was even worse was that she was starting to ever-so-slightly show. It was only noticeable if you looked real hard and close, but to the unsuspecting person it just looked like she was bloated from eating too much. She worried that since she was showing so early that people would get suspicious, to the point where she would rather not leave her room to prevent further staring. 

 

To make matters worse, on this particular day she was feeling extra sick and all the cleaning staff was being worked extra because there was a rumor that Supreme Leader Snoke would be visiting soon. Alyah was on edge the whole day and was getting sick from her pregnancy and anxiety of Snoke being on the same ship as her without Kylo being there. After finally finishing cleaning Phasma’s quarters, which she was thankfully not in at the time, she went back to her room to take a nap. However, those plans were short lived. She walked into the maids quarters and saw some of her fellow maids sitting quietly, but looking rather on edge. Alyah ignored them as she entered the passcode for her room. Shortly after she noticed why everyone was on edge.

 

“Kylo.” she said simply, trying to hide the shock in her voice. There he was, sitting on the edge of her bed. His face was blank and she couldn’t feel anything emanating from him. She blocked her emotions from being cast as she walked closer to him. 

 

“I’ve heard that you have been missing your shift. Phasma expressed concern.” he said to her, getting up and taking two steps to get right to her, caressing her cheek with his gloved hand. “What is wrong?” Alyah started to panic and hoped that it didn’t show on her face. She wished that Pez and Marc could appear and snatch her away without him noticing, but it was to late as she was in front of him and he was there, earlier than expected. 

 

“Nothing, I’ve just been sick. Think its just a stomach bug or something.” she said to him. He looked at her quizzically and silent for a couple of moments, before pressing his lips on her forehead. 

 

“I have been concerned as well. You turned yourself off, and haven’t been messaging me back.” he said to her. 

 

“I don’t want to worry you when you have other priorities.” 

 

“We’re bonded, you will always be my priority.” Alyah’s heart fluttered when the words processed in her mind. It was moments like that where Alyah thought she made the wrong decision to leave. She still wasn’t gone so she could change her mind. Maybe he wouldn’t be bad after all. 

 

Within seconds she could feel him embracing her emotionally, pouring all of what he felt into her at once. She rested her head on his chest as she fell into his physical embrace, feeling safe and secure in his arms. Alyah held back tears as she felt how genuine his feelings for her were.

 

“I… I can’t give it back right now.” she said to him sadly. He broke their embrace to look at her, wiping away the few tears that brimmed her eyes.

 

“I know. Lay down and rest up,” he said to her. She nodded as he placed her lips on hers quickly, before picking her up and laying her down. “I’ll come back later.” he said to her before leaving. Alyah lay there silent for a few minutes after his departure, before hearing commotion in her bathroom. She jumped up in surprise when she saw Marc fall out of her shower in the mirror.

 

“What the hell?!” she said to them in protest.

 

“We were in here packing things to leave and he showed up! Thank fuck we were in the bathroom when he did and managed to get in the shower quietly enough.” Marc said to her, coming out of her bathroom with Pez following behind him. 

 

“Yeah, good news is he didn’t find us. Bad news is this fucks everything up cause now he knows your sick so he’ll be keeping a close eye on you, making it difficult to leave without him noticing.”Pez said to her. 

 

“This just means that we have to get the hell out of here today. Snoke arrives in an hour, after that Ren will be plenty distracted with him to pay attention to anything else and we can get out on the shuttle.” Marc said to them. Alyah nodded as she settled back down on her bed, suddenly feeling light headed. “Are you having second thoughts? Please don’t tell me you are now that you’ve seen him.”

 

“No… maybe… I don’t know okay! You don’t know how it feels! I felt his feelings and - and FUCK it was overwhelmingly passionate and genuine. What if I’m wrong and he would be great?!” Alyah said frantically, feeling herself getting emotional and tears brimming her eyes. 

 

“I know babes, but we all know how he can get. He doesn’t have time for a child and we all know it, and so do you. The safest bet for now would be leaving.” Pez said to her, giving her a hug around the shoulders. Suddenly they heard commotion outside of the room, all three of them rushing out to see what the problem was. 

 

“Commander Ren just went apeshit in the bridge! We’ve all been sent to clean up the mess but no one will go because he’s killed three technicians!” Louie said to them. Alyah turned pale as she backed into her room once more with her friends following. 

 

“He knows. Oh lord, he knows. He bugged the room before he left.” Alyah said to them. Marc grabbed a bag from the bathroom and then her hand.

 

“We’re leaving, now.” Marc said.

 

“Do you want to kill us?!” Pez asked him.

 

“If he’s found out than we need to get off this ship right now.” he said, grabbing Pez’s hand with his other freehand and running them out of the maids quarters. The halls were semi-insanity, technicians and cleaning services alike were running all over. It wasn’t until they got to the transport bay that things got really hectic. People were running away from the bridge and the transport bay. They weaved through the people as sparks were flying around them, making Alyah nervous that they were getting to close to his sightline. 

 

“There’s the shuttle!” Pez said, seeing the ship in the distance. As they got closer in distance some of the chaos seemed to stop and the world moved slower for Alyah. She knew that how she was feeling was not good and could be harmful for the baby. She glanced over her shoulder and looked up at the bridge, seeing Kylo’s angry yet distraught look from the bridge window. 

 

_Why are you leaving? What did I do?_

 

His thoughts flooded her head, all questions as to why she was leaving. She opened up her mind and let her emotions reach him, including the heartbeat of their unborn child that she was able to feel.

 

**_It’s not you._ **

 

She sent him a final thought before closing her mind up once more and boarding the ship, just in time for it to take off. She could feel his emotions and received one last thought from him that caused her to break down and cry. 

 

_Take our child as far away from the First Order as you can._

 

With that, Alyah’s past life disappeared behind her as did her soulmate.


End file.
